The power of responsibility
by Mark Goudie on Mar 14, 2023
We believe that things in life happen to us, but in every event, traumatic or not, there is a lesson that the universe is wanting us to respond to.
In every event, every person in the situation has a role to play in showing us a lesson. Usually, we are to occupied or distracted to see what is unfolding for us in the present moment. But it is in these situations where we grow the most. Without these lessons we would have no bearing or guidance on what we need in our lives ongoing. If we refuse to see the events as life lessons, we end up feeling like we have no control or say in what our future entails. When we take a path of no control, by ignoring these lessons, it will seem like life is pushing us around.
Firstly, we need to accept that this event is happening for us to learn from, no matter who is doing or saying what. Without acceptance of the whole picture, we innately hand over the control and responsibility to others in the situation, ultimately disempowering ourselves from the lesson. We tend to victimise ourselves by saying "it's not fair" and feel that we are being punished.
Pain is our greatest teacher and that is the paradox of humanity.
Accepting that the situation is for you to learn from is the key to resolving trauma and many insecurities. Accepting that your decisions and choices in life have brought you to this sticky point, which now needs your attention and response. But in many instances, we ignore it because it's easier for us at the time. In doing this we bottle up these emotions and suppress them deep down. Seemed like a good idea at the time, didn't it? Well later it will arise tenfold and because we haven‚Äôt responded at the time, we will be privy to many similar situations, which will only trigger the original event.
Most of the time we are quick to lay blame, whether it's on others or on ourselves. Our unconscious mind doesn't understand blame, it only knows the truth. This results in our conscious mind trying to trick our unconscious, but this only creates a contradiction and further suffering.
Also, when we blame others, particularly if there is more than one person, we spread the responsibility around, resulting in the matter becoming more confusing. When we take ownership of all aspects of the situation and treat it as something to learn from, we can have better clarity about the detail of the lesson.
So, in accepting the situation and taking responsibility for not only your involvement, but everyone else's, we can heal from it. When we accept all aspects of the situation, we refrain from fighting it and we can then surrender to it and finally let it go. When reviewing a past experience or one that is happening, the best approach is to sit with no judgement, so that you can see the problem for what it is, not for what you believe is happening. This allows for you to see what is unfolding in its truest sense.
With this understanding you can see how we can create our lives through conscious response to universal events. When we stand up and have the courage to be totally responsible, we have the opportunity to dissolve heavy emotions and energy real time.
In each moment that we respond to, rather than react or ignore, we grow from. We take control of our lives in every aspect. When we take total responsibility, we will never feel blamed again. Who can blame you when you have already taken ownership?
This concept is a very empowering step in resolving traumatic events.